Life is a gift.

Life is a gift.

I’ve probably read this phrase, heard this phrase and even said this phrase, hundreds of times.  After September 24, 2012 – I believe that Life, truly is a gift.  I had no idea when I drove to Denver to meet with friends, that my journey back to Colorado Springs would forever change my life.

45mph.  The flow of traffic.  The sun had set and the street lights illuminated the roads.  New favorite music selected.  Notes and sounds filling the air.  Playful hum to match the music, gentle tapping on the steering wheel to match the beat.  Life was good.  Life was normal.  Life is a gift.

Glass breaking.  Cars colliding.  Smash.  Inflated airbags.  Is this really happening?  Crash. Music gone.  Gripping seatbelt.  Darkness.  Silence.  Pain. Heavy breathing.  Hot tears running down my face.  Pain.  So much pain. 

Are you ok?  Voice repeated.  Are you ok?

My eyes meet his.  Again – are you ok?

No.  My response.  No.  I’m not ok.

Sirens.  Motion.  Pain increasing.  What’s your name?  Voice repeated.  Ma’am, what’s your name?

Elizabeth.

My name is Elizabeth.

 

September 24^th,2012 will forever be imprinted in my mind.  Life is a gift.  My seatbelt saved my life.  At least that’s what they tell me.  I never imagined that I would be in an accident like this.  EMS’d from the scene.  Emergency room shuffle.  CAT scans.  Ultrasounds.  Every measure taken to be sure I was ok.  Bumps and bruises was what I walked away with.  Bumps and bruises.

Why did I survive this crash?  I’ve asked myself this question probably a hundred times a day since the crash.  The most common answers, “Because my time is not yet done on this earth.”  Or “The Lord isn’t finished with you yet.”   But what does that even mean?  This is probably what I’ve wrestled with the most.  When is “done” actually done?  And when is “finished” really finished? 

The best thing about these questions – they are not mine to answer.  The overwhelming echo of what I’ve learned from this accident is that God is in control.  Seconds would have made a huge difference in how the crash could have played out.  Seconds!  God is in control.  My seatbelt could have malfunctioned, airbags could have not deployed – God is in control. 

“It is a freeing thing to understand that you are not in control.” –the words from Matt Chandler, pastor at the Village Church in Dallas, TX.  Words that wrung in my mind and heart as I heard them only days after the crash.  The continual realization that I am not in control is not an easy one for me to grasp.  If I’m honest – more days than not, I try to be in control and I lose sight that Author of all life and creation is truly the one who is writing this story.  It is not mine to author.  But He is gracious and He is good and He is kind and I do get to play a part in His Story.  So I look at life and say, Yes.  It is a gift.  It can be taken away in a moment.  And it can be used to draw hearts closer to His.  And if nothing else that you feel or take away from my story, is your heart being drawn one step closer to His, then it was all worth it. 

Life is a gift.

 

A few pictures from the collision.